Never make the development of your manhood contingent on ‘what the ladies like’ because different ladies like different things and it’s a very weak metric to use what women like as the barometer to judge your life because their tastes can be so fickle and you are also giving up your autonomy as a man by basing your actions on what you imagine someone else likes. By being real and basing your development on proper principles and not women’s preference, you will put yourself on very strong ground, and this will allow you to attract a woman who actually like you and not something you have.
A lot of guys end up confused in life because they base their life on what someone else wants, and nobody can read minds. This ends up with individuals who will always be chasing a false image that is always shifting and they will constantly have to ask questions like, “What do I do next?”
I used to believe in that a man needs to be a leader, he needs to be super fit, he needs to be this, he needs to be that, but when you look at it, you have loser type dudes around the way who have kids with 10 different women and some of those women are fine. What I have found more important than anything when dealing with women is you have to get at them. Throw all notions of what you need or what you should have out the window. If you don’t get at her, you won’t have her. All of those extras make it easier by reducing her resistance to your approach, but if your social skills are not on point, then you won’t get anywhere. If you want to know one thing to work on to improve your dealings with women, it’s your conversation and your aggression with conversing with women.
There’s a huge difference in women that are followers of Jesus in word and in deed. The church is filled with women who go to club on Saturdays and come to church on Sundays. To actually do what the Bible says and live that lifestyle is completely different. You won’t see the type of women I’m referring to in the clubs, they don’t have tons of male friends and these women were actually raised to respect the authority of a man. Sadly, you won’t see many of these women because they get wifed up quickly. Having a woman who occasionally posts up Bible verses, but 50% of her pics are in the club isn’t the type of woman that I’m referring to. These women are hard to find because usually they are out the way and they aren’t the type of women that date around a ton or let men get close to them. “Going to church”, aka the building, doesn’t it make any easier to find them, because, like was mentioned, the building of church is full of people faking the funk. It just ultimately comes down to character analysis and you have to thoroughly screen any woman you deal with.
Man I think in this day and age, there is just a great spiritual sickness, and we’re seeing the fruit of wicked movements like ‘the sexual revolution’, etc. All of that may satisfy your urges, but how many still feel they are missing something? What’s missing is genuine love and the unique experience of knowing that the person you are with is YOURS. This is a perfect verse that describes the modern day:
Because of the increase of wickedness, the love of most will grow cold,
The times are so wicked and full of lawless people that it’s hard to forge an honest connection because people are hurting each other with their lying and cheating. This then makes people’s hearts callous up and they get to the point that they couldn’t care less whether the person they are dealing with comes or goes.
We’re covering up this spiritual sickness with band-aids, aka techniques to ‘seduce’ women. There is no desire for people to be chaste, so a lot of men think they can take one of these well seasoned women who have been around with many different guys and then ‘game her’ into loyalty. It’s not going to work. When someone feels that, in their privacy, no one is watching them… then they will feel like if they don’t get caught, it didn’t happen.
Now I finally understand why the Bible says do not be equally unyoked. I need a woman that is an actual follower of Jesus and not just in name only.
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