Dear Julia Stiles and her fans,
No. I am so sorry, but just no.
Some of us at Nerd At the Cool Table have an appreciation for quality white women and Julia Stiles almost ruined a whole generation of impressionable bunnies with her movies. Hell at one point, I even fell for the Julia Stiles type thinking it was all perfect. You know, the white girl that is so enamored in African American culture that she does nothing but hang with sistas to be like them, forgets her upbringing, snatches up a wanna be down accent and feels “white men don’t like me”. One thing that bunnies that wanted to be Julia Stiles didn’t realize was that one day, it wasn’t going to be a one upper on other women anymore. In fact, 63% of white women that “wanna be down” end up being the first ones to catch a one hitter quitter during a fracas, and end up on WorldStar Hip Hop.
Is that what your parents raised you to do? Catch a beat down as your head full of long hair slaps the side of a bar like Rick James when Charlie Murphy slapped him? I definitely don’t think so.
When I met a honey like Julia Stiles in my younger days, I swore I was winning. Even had a pep in my step and a smile on my face.
Little did I know how much in the mirror practicing went down and unnatural it was. I also began to realize that having a white girl with tons of rhythm was detrimental to my chances of keeping her because one thing about brothas, if a woman has rhythm, they will do whatever it takes to relieve you of your post in order to have a sample. It was all bad man. One time I got left for a lightskin dude that could dance better than me and I knew it was something to cut out of my life forever. I mean I’ve never been the type to cut a rug.
The Julia Stiles type loves to date nothing but black men. On the surface, that seems like a true win until you’re forced to dig deeper because every brotha in town has that look when you’re in public walking with her. You know, the slight head shake and eyes hit the floor look. When ten brothas can dish that look out in a 5 mile radius, you’ve done caught yourself a flop of a bunny. A “hare” if you wish. We don’t mess with hares because there is a select group of gentleman that do. More power to those fellas but this isn’t the business a Bunny God is in. There came a point where Julia Stiles had been in enough “Love me some black men forever and ever” movies that she ended up in the Bourne series and folks didn’t even want her there. Know why? Because she was out here flaunting like this after the director said “It’s a wrap!”
I write this Un-appreciation to let bunnies know something. Don’t FLAUNT the fact that you associate with black folks so heavily. It’s unbecoming and any sensible black man won’t be about this. We don’t want Julia Stiles all over again. It’s all just one big sham just like the white girl that messed with black men in college just to marry a white guy after she got her degree. She was never down and portrayed it horribly. Hey, she’s dating a white guy now and guess what probably on his mind during sex?
“You let Mekhi Phifer choke you out on the big screen, how did I get here.”
Bunnies, Don’t be Julia Stiles. Don’t go against the grain to be down. Be you and you will be loved by the right brothas.