We let it get to this point. We allowed voices to be raised, points to be made and humbleness to be sent packing with a one way ticket and no concerns of return home fare. So, with the utmost of love in my heart; from me to you; Shhh…Be Quiet. This is America you can view this motherfucker as you see fit. In return…I can exercise my right to speak freely and tell you to “Shut it up”. The logic has left the building. People have started to believe their own tweets as being real life. The minute you unlock your phone or pull it out of your pocket to type some thoughts you have convinced yourself will be profound; realize someone like me doesn’t care. Someone like me won’t read your tweets and take them seriously if your titty lumps or thirst face is on full display. Allow me to show you to the Promised Land.
This world is cold. This world needs many things to return warmth to its collective heart. I’m not Jesus so I can’t save it. What I can provide is a ray of hope. The glimmer of light shining through the darkness is this: No pastor can save you unless his robe is made of authentic Gucci print. No human being was built perfect. One titty is bigger than the other and one ball hangs a little lower (pause). Through all of this….God still wants us to be great. See…that took 3 minutes or less to read and in that time you didn’t tweet something that nobody cares about. You’re welcome.
I know you want to feel like you have a place in this world. You do. I know you want people to respect your acquired knowledge that you may or may not have overpaid for. They will. I know you have dreams. Some people will care. I don’t. Is that rude? No. God still cares. This is written with your future in mind. Tweet less and do more. Of all your 99,000 tweets how many are thoughts people with common sense didn’t already know? How many of your tweets if ignored will cause the world to stop functioning? How many of your tweets have felt more real because they reflect how you feel in real life? See where I’m going? Probably not…Save your real life thoughts for people you know in real life. They value them more. People on twitter don’t care. If I want to be preached to; I know a great white pastor who makes me believe I can accomplish anything; ill go talk to him.
I want everyone to touch the sky and spread the love of the lord. But even pastors take a seat every Sunday. They know and understand the value in “Shutting Up”. There’s a church song that can sum it all up, “Be Still… and Know I am God”. Let me translate… “Shhh be quiet”. I know you want to stand out. I want you to stand out. But let your skills, talents and gifts be the things that generate you attention…not the amount of tweets you can fit in throughout the day that people won’t care about. Tweeting what your child will be eating for dinner won’t make me care. I’m sorry. Tweeting about how much you hate your job won’t make me care. If anything, it will inspire the mischievous spirit inside me to encourage you to quit your job. Just remember as a child even one of your best friends told you to “shut up” at some point…you got mad then and probably replied with something bitter…but you did shut up and realized “If they don’t wanna hear it; then I won’t say it”. Somehow this early life lesson has been forgotten. Listen more and tweet less. Watch the blessings from heaven rain down on you.